Why do not arbitrarily evaluate others

Not long ago, a title for the “small Wanjun Jinming low-profile appearance of the airport stars dim and no one knows the news” boarded the hot search list, the content is probably the former child star Jin Ming, a short hair element low-key appearance of the airport, no assistant, Own a person for hauling procedures, in the crowd shuttle but no one recognized it.
News, a lot of friends have ridiculed Jin Ming, said she was “hours, and may not be good,” and even some people say that she is “injured Zhongyong” representatives, has been declining, when it is a household name, and now is obliterate Passers-by.
However, the real Jin Ming than we imagined to be much better, grew up after her school has been the most important, to give up the opportunity to study art institutions, admitted to the Peking University International Relations Institute, is a typical school Pa.

After graduating from college to return to the entertainment show, play drama, host, and she always stressed that he is just an ordinary literary and art workers.
In fact, the so-called red and not red are the media over-interpretation, acting Ye Hao, presided over the strike, just a job only, Jin Ming himself did not exist in the mouth of the user said that the growth of the failure of the failure, A crowd of people who have to eat melon Jin Ming’s “not red” and bitterly?

I think it is because we are too preconceived, too like to use their own standards to measure the rules of life of others, too like to use their own cognitive experience to measure other people’s emotional attitude.
We always inadvertently to evaluate the lives of others, free to guess the quality of others. And this approach, whether people or things, will not give us the right to judge.

A person with good self-cultivation, often have a high emotional business people, they know how to respect others, do not arbitrarily guess others.
They often look long-term, experience, pattern, mature and full of inner, do not need to belittle others and show off their own to show the noble human nature, they know more “empathy” and empathy, know how to respect others Efforts, like the famous American philanthropist Kenneth Belling.
In the nineties of last century, the United States philanthropist Kenneth Belling through the San Francisco Bay area, suddenly found his wallet disappeared. Assistant anxious to say:

“It must have been lost in the morning through the slums of Berkeley. What can I do?”

Belin said helplessly:

“Can only wait for someone to pick up wallet contact us.”
Two hours later, the assistant said disappointingly:

“We should not have hope for the slums.”

“No, I want to wait and see.” Belling said quietly.

Assistant is very puzzled:

“There ‘s a business card in the wallet, and if the picker wants to return, it’ s only a few minutes to make a phone call, so we’ll have to wait for the afternoon, obviously they did not return the plan.

Belin noncommittal, still insist on waiting.
The following are the same as the ”
When the day is going to be black, the phone suddenly rang, picking up the purse, and asking them to take a purse in a place called Kata Street. Assistant whispered:

“Will this be a trap? Maybe they want extortion or extortion?”

Belin did not bother, but drove to.
To the agreed place, a ragged boy came over to them, it was clear that it was a slum child, and his hand is Bailey lost wallet. Assistant took the wallet, the inventory found inside the money actually a lot of points!
The following are the same as the ”
“I have a request,” the boy hesitated, “can you give me a little money?”

At this time, the assistant laughed:

“Haha, I know they must have a map.”

Belin interrupts the assistant, smiled and asked the boy how much money.

“Just a dollar is enough.” The boy said embarrassed. “I have been away for a long time to find a place where there is a public call, but I have no money, and now I need to pay for the dollar that I just called.
The following are the same as the ”
Watching the boy clear eyes and innocent smile, assistant shame to lower his head. Belin was excited to give the boy a hug. Immediately, Belling changed the charity plan before, and invested in Berkeley City built several schools, specifically to recruit slums in the money to school children.
At the opening ceremony, Belin said emotionally:

“Do not pretend to speculate on others, we need to free up space and opportunities to meet a pure and kind heart, and that the most worthy of our investment!”

After reading this little story, we praise the good cultivation of Belling, many people will certainly scold the assistant, the dog looks low, underestimated the character of the little boy, but in real life, we are not the same as him What?

When we find someone else’s behavior and we are not the same time, we always narrow perspective, the heart of the high point of standing on the moral point of condemnation of others, to judge their own experience with each other’s merits, and even to include this People of a class of people under the conclusion, labeled.

But in fact we do not understand what they had had experience, how to hurt.
Not long ago, there was a fire on the Internet about “Rejecting kidnapping” video:
A car man is accusing a seemingly healthy young man not for the elderly seat, when he stood up, people knew he had no left leg;

Classmates all people are advised to persuade a classmate Do not give the face to drink this glass of wine, when he drunk into the hospital, people know that he was heavily allergic to alcohol;
Many people are condemning a child who helps other students to fetch water, and when they see his poor family, people know that he needs to earn his own tuition and living expenses.
In fact, the scene in this video in our lives abound. We often do not go through careful understanding, in-depth investigation on the matter easily to the conclusion, the people labeled, so now more and more Internet violence, light human flesh others, people are not peace; while people are nervous, Depression suicide.
Sometimes, you are free to guess the language is a sharp sword, murder in the invisible.
Like the film “search” in the leaves blue autumn, life and life was overwhelmed by public opinion, but finally jumped to the floor.
Zhuangzi said: son of non-fish, how can we know the fish? I would like to add a sentence: son of him, how can he know the pain?

How can a person’s life begin, can not be chosen, but each of us has the right to choose what kind of life, fortunate and unhappy, music and not music, never need someone to evaluate.
So, as a bystander, please remember that life is someone else, the road is chosen by others.
You are not someone else, you can not really understand the lives of others, can not really understand other people’s emotions, but can not really feel the same person’s life. Perhaps the happiness you think is worthless for others, and perhaps the pain you think is sweet for others.

We need to always remind ourselves, do not touch on the lives of others, to respect the decisions of others.

The ancients said: mortal things, never to its knowledge, deliberate speculation, and then dare to plan. Even so, if you do not know a person’s past, do not easily evaluate, so that the conclusion is also unfair. Treat others should be biased, nor self-deprecating. Although it is difficult, but not impossible to do so.

Chai Jing has written:

The truth is often lost in tears. When we are to find the whole truth, in fact, has long been so real to live, everyone can not speak with the pain, he is only a tenacious life in the form of show in front of you, this is enough, only to Understanding, tolerance, forgiveness, support.

May you understand that everything in the world is hard to come by, and that every state of life is worthy of respect.
So, never free to speculate on others, this should be your most basic cultivation of life.